I Unplugged The Owlet Today

I unplugged the “Owlet” last week, or as we’ve lovingly referred to it these past six months, “Owlie.” For those of you who don’t know about this incredible technology that I could not have survived these past six months without, the “Owlet” is a fabric “sock” that “uses pulse oximetry to track your infant’s heart rate and oxygen levels while they sleep. This information is communicated to your phone via a base station that is designed to notify you if your baby’s heart rate or oxygen levels fall outside of preset zones.” Phew…catch all that? 

I knew about this technology before Trey was born, but felt that it was just another extravagant purchase designed to prey upon the insurmountable mountain of fears that parenthood naturally and understandably entails. I also was unaware that Sudden Infant Death Syndrome was anything more than an urban myth, if I’m being honest, or something that used to happen in the 80’s back when it was referred to simply as, “crib death.” Or if I’m being REALLY honest: Something that happens to other people. I don’t beat myself up about this, for how could I have known? When an otherwise completely healthy baby goes to bed at night, you really don’t expect to find them no longer with you. It defies all logic and all that is natural! I am also a firm believer (after becoming as much of a “SIDS expert” as a bereaved mother could become) that SIDS cannot be prevented nor stopped. In SIDS, once the “episode” is underway, there is no reversing it. There’s even a woman in one of my support groups that used this product on her child that is no longer with her and there was Nothing. She. Could. Do. No amount of CPR or resuscitation or rousing the child is enough to stop it. Hence the name of the syndrome…

However, with all of that said, it’s very common in the SIDS community for mothers and fathers to use this fantastic device for their future children. It’s really more for us than anything. The soft green light emitting from the base station illuminated the wall next to Flynn’s crib. Every night that I woke up in a cold sweat panic, I would be comforted back to sleep by that light. It was a GOD SEND! Then, something funny happened. I would sometimes just stop putting it on him every single night. Not out of laziness or any legitimate reason: I could feel myself detaching from the product. Growing more comfortable. After about a week of realizing I had not put it on him, I pulled the plug on my old dear friend. She was free and I was free. I know that it might be naïve or arrogant to believe that lightening won’t strike twice, but it’s something I consider often. I unplugged the Owlet last week because SIDS has ruled my life long enough, and in many ways always will. But this was one small step towards my freedom. Thank you, “Owlie”. I couldn’t have made it this far without you, and thank you for letting us go…